Just marking his territory

1: 28 a.m. A man at 644 W. Dickson St. reported a man urinating off the balcony and trying to hit people with his urine.

won't someone think of the children?!

3: 04 p. m. A woman on Northeast F Street reported a man urinated on the tires of a backhoe.

a portrait of discretion and modesty

10: 36 p. m. A man at Neighborhood Market, 1819 S. Eighth St., reported a man urinating in the parking lot and, in doing so, exposing himself to children.

don't cross the streams!

3: 04 p. m. A man at World Gym, 2003 S. W. Regional Airport Blvd., reported two men urinating in the sauna.

i think they meant Orina de Vida

5: 48 p. m. A man at Agua de Vida, 608 S. Thompson St., reported someone urinated in a storage room.

oil, hot dogs, urination, conspiracies, satan!

4:39 p.m. A clerk at 1540 E. 15th St. reported some children have been stealing quarts of oil all day.

12:24 p.m. A man on Arkansas 265 West reported someone put toilet paper all over his yard, hot dogs in all the toilets and spread macaroni throughout his house.

4:14 p.m. A caller on South Washington Avenue reported a man sitting on the sidewalk, urinating into a bottle.

11:53 p.m. A woman at County Line Road in Bethel Heights reported her neighbors had been partying all night and she was ready to go to bed.

12:16 a.m. A man at 15646 Coose Hollow Court in Rogers reported a helicopter flew over his house and a few minutes later a car with its headlights off drove up and down his driveway.

8:00 p.m. A woman reported children not wearing shirts were at the end of the street at 736 E. Ash St. chanting and some children were hiding because something satanic was coming after them.

6:29 p.m. A man reported a man in a blue Honda Accord driving recklessly on North Thompson Street. The man had a paper bag on his head and was running people off the road, the caller said.